How Do I Find My Authentic Singing Voice?

 
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 Authentic. Honest. Unique.

Words that are craved by just about every singer I’ve ever met.

But you know you and your voice are already one-of-a-kind, right?

Which means it’s less about FINDING your authentic voice and more about FREEING it.

About gently removing the BARRIERS TO AUTHENTIC EXPRESSION.

Micro-managing, mimicking, hiding and identity.

 

Micro-managing

Is when you keep your hands tightly on the wheel or wrangle your voice so that it “does as it’s told.”

It’s following a paint-by-numbers formula - louder here, brighter here, add vibrato, end with more sweetness.

You get the drift.

Singers micro-manage because of

  • perfectionism

  • fear of “failure”

  • needing to be impressive

  • lack of trust in their voice

  • or simply because they didn’t know there was any other way.

HOW TO SOFTEN THE BARRIER:

For some singers, learning technique in a more supportive (and expression-focused) way plus practice can help with developing trust in their voice.

But for most of us, practice doesn’t equal trust. This is where mindset and embodiment work around self-worth are crucial.

It’s also important to learn the subtle sensations and thoughts that you experience when micro-managing your voice.

Every singer has “tells.”

Physical ones can be things like furrowing your brow, a glottal onset, widening eyes, tongue or jaw tension, hesitating at the start of a line.

And mental ones are intrusive thoughts like “that high note is coming up, get ready!” or “it’s that hard run now” or “it’s that bit you always screw up” or *enter terrified expletive here.*

Ask yourself “What do I believe my voice CAN’T DO without me ‘trying’ or ‘making sure it happens'? And is that actually true?”

If it IS true, is there a more organic way of creating that sound that doesn’t require quite as much effort?
(energy and effort aren’t the same thing)


Mimicking

Mimicking other artists is actually a very valuable tool to explore colour, texture, nuance and storytelling.

We want to use it to learn and play but we don’t want to STAY in that phase.

(And people stay in that phase often because they don’t think anyone will like their real voice if they stop copying someone else.)

HOW TO SOFTEN THE BARRIER:

When listening to your favourite artists, can you pinpoint QUALITIES that you love in their voice and bring them to life in your own?

That way you’re not copying every little detail, pronunciation and onset - simply gathering inspiration (and improving your ear).


Hiding

Hiding (which I also call “armouring up”) is about not letting yourself be seen. You know, protecting your soft underbelly.

Some people would call this performing, but in my opinion, the most potent and moving performances are where the audience get to experience the singer’s humanity.

Really feel the story they’re telling and what they went through.

We hide because we

  • fear being judged or criticised

  • worry we’re not good enough

  • are afraid to “take up too much space” or that we’ll be seen as cocky or arrogant

  • feel like we don’t belong.

HOW TO SOFTEN THE BARRIER:

Being visible and sharing your vulnerability takes time and should not be rushed.

There are far too many singers who push themselves to perform before they’ve worked on settling their insecurities and expanding their capacity for sensation (nerves).

You might know this as a knee-buckling incident of stage fright.

1) Start by genuinely feeling the emotions (connected to the song) in your own body, without anyone else around.

We can often intellectualise feeling and think the emotion rather than feel it, notice if that tends to happen with you.

2) Can you continue to experience those emotions and tell the story through adding the lyrics and melody?

It might feel a little exposing and risky at first, that’s normal.

3) Then start to try this in safe spaces. With a supportive singing coach, family member or friend.

Leave the most situations that amplify your nerves the most until last - this might include live video, being in front of a public audience, in a recording studio or an audition.


Identity

What you currently believe you’re capable of will often define what you believe is possible.

If you identify as shy, you might assume your authentic voice can’t be powerful.

Singers who feel most comfortable in their lower register may tell themselves that higher notes “aren’t for them.”

As your perception of yourself shifts, so will your voice. This can happen naturally over time or you can consciously work on this.

Stretching into a new identity comes with discomfort, imposter syndrome and growing pains, but this doesn’t mean it’s inauthentic. It means it’s NEW.

The way I describe it is that you’re currently wearing a suit that’s too tight (singing with a timid, sweet voice when you long to access power for example), but the next size up is too big (feels unnatural and new).

You might feel silly or audacious, wearing an oversized suit that you’re yet to grow into. But that is what’s required for change. If you feel uncomfortable, you’re doing it right.

HOW TO SOFTEN THE BARRIER:

  • Become aware of the stories you tell yourself about who you are and what you’re capable of. Where did they originate?

  • Remind yourself that your past does not define your future. That you’re stepping into new territory and it’s meant to feel like a stretch.

This is how confidence is built. Being afraid and awkward, moving anyway, failing or succeeding and recognising that you’re still standing and have your own back. Rinse and repeat.

  • Start to collect moments of possibility. Moments where you surprise yourself, where you felt that suit fit a little better.

  • Find yourself a cheerleader, someone that will encourage you to keep stepping into this new desired version of yourself. Someone who can reflect their belief in you when your own is shaky.

Building Your Own Menu

Your voice is pretty incredible and can create a huge range of sounds and colours, so which concoction of colours and textures is your authentic voice?

They all are!

And how you use, express and shape your voice will change depending on context (the space you’re in, the occasion and and who’s there) and the style you’re singing.

Embrace your versatility as an artist. Play. Experiment.

Notice what sensations, colours and textures you love to feel and hear coming out of your own mouth.

You may find one you enjoy using more than the rest or maybe a selection that you love. Your menu.

Each voice get to be a different hat you wear for different occasions.

Different facets of your personality that come to life in certain scenarios.

Enjoy having a whole dress-up box of options to play with!

 
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